Two summers ago I visited Patrick's grave at the Lawn of the Folded Flags with his son Patrick Junior, or PJ. Nearly 13, with smooth brown skin, dark eyes and a dimpled smile, he already looked like the photos I'd seen of his father. And four years after his dad's death he still spoke about him as if he were alive, saying things like, “My dad and me, our favorite movie is Black Hawk Down. We've watched it hundreds of times together.”

I watched PJ walk around the stone where his dad was buried and then kneel down and run his fingers over its smooth cool surface. He took a piece of paper out of the pocket of his shorts, folded it tightly and buried it in the earth beside his father.

Later he told me what he'd written: Dad, this is Patrick. I promise I will stay out of trouble. I want to make you proud of me. I miss you.

There were little stickers all over the gravestone. PJ's younger sister Janessa who lives in Oceanside had pasted them there. Tiny hearts, glittery statues of liberty, American flags. Today the stickers have faded into blurry white shapes that I trace with my fingers.

I never met Patrick McCaffrey but I've met a lot of people who have and they all say what an unusually good man he was and how badly they miss him. After the United States terrorist attack on September 11, 2001, Patrick joined the 579th National Guard Engineers Alpha Company out of Petaluma, California. He thought he'd be serving at home but he was sent to Iraq. Two hours before Patrick was gunned down by the Iraqi soldiers he was training, someone took a photo of him helping a friend who'd collapsed from heat exhaustion in the 125 degree heat in Balad, Iraq. His flag-draped coffin was one of the few to be welcomed home and captured on film by the media at that time.

When I stayed with his mom Nadia at her home in Tracy, California, I slept in the room that Patrick put together for PJ and Janessa to stay in when they visit their grandma. I slept in their bunk bed, surrounded by Lion King pillows and a beady-eyed teddy bear wearing a knitted American flag vest and a poster of Nicholas Cage in Windtalkers.

The next morning Nadia made creamy scrambled eggs and told me, in that rich French accent of hers, about the time she and Patrick lived in Tahiti for a year-and-a-half before he became a teenager. They went barefoot and ate breadfruit cooked over an open fire. Patrick learned to kayak and windsurf and deep sea fish, charming the locals and the tourists. While I sipped my coffee and savored each bite of my eggs, she told me how Patrick learned the history of the island and how he'd team up with some of the taxi drivers and take tourists on tours of the island, showing them the waterfalls and sacrificial sites. Although he never charged for these tours he'd usually get tips that he'd bring home to his mom.

“I picture him in Tahiti I think, more often than anywhere else,” Nadia said, a distant look in her eyes.

Now I sit on the lawn by Patrick's grave and notice how tall the nearby tree has grown and think of Patrick's mom. The last time we spoke I could hear the deep weariness in her voice. Weariness from her body and its continual large and small betrayals. And weariness from wanting to do more, always more, for the young Iraq and Afghanistan veterans who reach out to her each day.

I take out the email I've printed from John Keith, a young veteran with PTSD who lives in Texas.

“Patrick, everyone says that you're the guy who was always there for them, who would do anything to help anyone. Well, listen to what your mom's been up to,” I say. Then I read part of John's email out loud. The tiny American flags around the soldiers' graves flutter in the wind:

I am a disabled Iraq War Veteran. I was on an aircraft carrier during Operation Iraqi Freedom. After returning I suffered a 12 ft. fall, breaking my ankle in several places, breaking my back in three places and suffered a TBI (traumatic brain injury.) After getting medically retired my case was handed over to the Department of Veteran Affairs. I was awarded 60% disability compensation, which equates to $900 a month. After struggling with this situation for three years I became very suicidal and depressed. I wrote a letter asking for help, and sent it to every Veteran Organization, Senator, Congressman and anyone else I could think of that might listen. That is when I met Nadia McCaffrey. She was a very refreshing person to have in my life. She automatically made me feel at ease. She actually listened to me and was genuinely concerned about my situation. She became proactive in getting me to appointments with the VA, and that is when I stopped thinking about suicide every day… She's not only my friend, but I consider her a mother as well…

I fold up the email and put it back in my bag. I watch people in black clothes leave a distant gravesite and walk up the hill to their cars. I pour some water on Patrick's gravestone and scrub it with the small yellow towel I've brought for this purpose. I picture PJ the first time I met him, in his red and black football cleats, impatient to get out on the field.

Then I remember how he'd pointed to the raised REDSKINS FOREVER letters on his dad's stone the day we visited him together. “See here? Me and my dad are big Redskin fans. I'm going to keep playing football and I'm going to be really good at it, because I know that's what he wants.” Then his eyes started to tear up and he looked away and started chewing on the inside of his cheek.

Before I leave Eternal Hills I call Nadia. I know how much it hurts her to be so far from where her only child is buried. She picks up after one ring and I tell her where I am. I hear her swallow.

“Is it raining there?” she asks.

I tell her the sun is shining. “It's peaceful here on the Lawn of the Folded Flags,” I say. “And though Patrick's so far from you, he's surrounded by his band of brothers, by all the other warriors from all the different wars.”

“Yes,” she says, so softly I can barely hear her.

Earmarks — those endearing Congressional plums that brought us “The Bridge To No Where” — sort of slipped under the radar of the recent news cycles out of Washington this past week.

Democratic House members have pledged to not submit earmarks for for-profit projects. Republicans have one-upped that by pledging a ban on all earmarks for a year.

Earmarks are the fast track for a Congressman to return favors to his district under the euphemism of returning back home tax dollars paid to the feds. It avoids the scrutiny, cumbersome and painful process of priorities required for federal spending through the House Appropriations Committee.

Except for the abuses we all remember John McCain citing during his 2008 presidential run, I must confess I’m rather ambivalent on the subject. It strikes at the heart of representative (lower case) republicanism that works well in our government. It’s an uneven playing field, however, because some congressmen are more aggressive playing the game than others.

It just so happens one of the leading Republicans considering earmarks a dirty word and emblematic of a broken system is Darrell Issa, my congressmen in the 49th Congressional with home offices in Vista, Calif.

In 2006, Issa was one of the first House member to publicly post all his earmarks on his Web site. In 2008, he said he would restrict his earmark requests to only public projects. This week as a ranking minority leader of the Oversight and Government Reform Committee, he joined nine other Republican leaders in the never-again pledge, or until the next session, or until Congress controls spending, or all of the above.

I am here to report that my rep in Congress is a man of his word. No earmarks for 2010. I then decided to look at his earmark requests for 2009

Tee hee. Tee hee. He submitted 21 projects for $213,767,000.

The 49th covers all of northern San Diego County and parts of southern Riverside County. It is a classic gerrymandered district guaranteeing a Republican victory unless he pulls off something dumb as did Rep. Duke Cunningham several years ago in the 50th and as a result is still serving time in the pokey.

I reviewed all 21 earmark projects Issa submitted for 2009 and found two that made me feel queasy. Since Issa is a straight-shooter I can’t for the life of me understand why his requests were not funneled through the regular channels. His office did not return my calls asking whether all the projects were approved so I am only assuming they were since he posted them. Another caveat: Some of these listed items are continuing projects requiring annual appropriations.

* $110.3 million for a new federal courthouse in downtown San Diego.
* $6M for an integrated communications system for 15 fire districts.
* $3.5M for upgrading the communications system of all county law enforcement agencies.
* $500K for a gang suppression unit for the city of Oceanside.
* $250K to equip a new emergency operations center in Lake Elsinore.
* $13M for a 100-year flood control channel for the cities of Murietta and Temecula.
* $7.2M for the first phase of the San Luis Rey Valley flood control channel.
* $2M for potable water and desalter for a water district in the city of Perris.
* $2M for a water reclamation project for Rancho California, a seniors community.
* $1M to complete final design of a water system for Camp Pendleton Marine Base.
* $355K to supplement an open space, land-use study in Riverside County.
* $45M reforestation of areas prone to wildfires.
* $1.6M to prepare exiting military doctors and nurses for the private sector.
* $1M to build a new community health center in Vista.
* $1M to build and replace a health clinic in Oceanside.
* $8M to improve a bottleneck between the I-15 and I-215 freeways.
* $5M widen a section of State 76 in Oceanside.
* $3.1M for a transit center serving new private development in Oceanside.
* $2M to widen a street in Vista.
* $1M to study expanding a small airstrip in Temecula.
* $500K to renovate and expand the Fallbrook Boys and Girls Club.

It is only the last two items that might be considered shaky, especially from a congressman who prides himself on pinching pennies.

I find it hypercritical earmarks for health clinics were included in his 2009 requests yet he plans to vote against the health reform package which includes money for identical projects.

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EPILOGUE

I applaud Mr. Issa for his transparency and only wish all Congressmen and Senators do the same. In his case, earmarks lose the sting and bad rap they probably don’t deserve. Of course, it also begs the question why he continued requesting earmarks as recently as four years ago when he was publicly speaking against them as part of our broken government. The remaining thorn in my side remains the most fundamental dilemma facing federal appropriations. That is, why should a taxpayer in the 1st Congressional District of New York pay part of a $1 million tab to study the merits of an airstrip in Temecula, Cailf.?

Ultimately, what cost you the Race, getting out of the car and running, getting lost or switching tasks?
Allie: Getting out of the cab didn’t make that much of a difference in the long run. The biggest thing was our taxi didn’t know where he was going. We asked a ton of people and we just could not find that first temple so we switched tasks. It was a combination of bad luck and the fact that the flag task was impossible.

It seemed like you attempted the flags for about two seconds.
Steve: Allie tried and tried but it was too heavy. It reminded me of the poker girls trying to hit that .
Allie: If the demonstrators were having trouble, how was I supposed to do it? My dad even said, “If anyone finished this task, they deserve to win this leg.”
Steve: And I still thought we had a chance because we got to the temple when [the brothers] were there and we did that thing pretty fast.

How much later were you than the second to last team?
Allie: Not sure because it isn’t like you’re looking at a watch. I talked to Dan yesterday and he thought we were 15 minutes behind. I think it was a little longer.
Steve: That hurts a little because 15 minutes isn’t a long time especially after we heard they had to get gas. It came down to finding the right coconut. The odds were against us as the last ones there. Allie threw over a hundred.
Allie: Watching the show gave me closure because I realized there wasn’t really anything we could have done better. It was just not in our favor that day.

To place first in Seychelles, you sacrificed your luggage. Did you get them back post-elimination?
Allie: They didn’t tell us during the Race but they returned them after elimination. We already accepted that the bags were gone. We wanted to win and we weren’t going to risk elimination to turn around for clothes.
Steve: She got some clothes from a woman at the airport and [the cops] gave me some so we were gonna be okay. And actually had we had the backpacks and the 30 pounds of bananas on that mile walk, we may not have come in first. It was probably better to travel light.

Of course, it meant you had to go without makeup.
Allie: I was on national TV so I wanted to look okay, but it was probably good for me to go without and step outside my comfort zone.
Steve: I’m the one who should have been using makeup. After going hard all day, I looked like I was 90 and she looked beautiful.

And we’re guessing that fancy prize made it all worth it.
Allie: We got to stay in a huge villa right on the beach and explore the island and eat a great meal. It was paradise. We looked at each other like, “Is this really happening to us?”
Steve: This place $14,000 a night. That is not our normal vacation accommodations. I already had to promise my wife I’ll take her. We wished we could have invited all the teams over for a party.

How did participating affect your relationship?
Allie: We were already best friends, but now we have all these inside jokes and this experience that no one will understand. We were never 20 feet apart and still had a blast together. Our relationship grew and I will cherish this for the rest of my life.
Steve: It was never about the million-dollar prize. Not that we couldn’t use it, but it was about taking the journey together. It was a bigger bummer that we had to stop playing the game. It’s such a rush to rip open that envelope and go. We just wanted to follow behind the remaining teams and play. This ranks up there with a World Series win.

Monty Brinton/CBS

Federal authorities intercepted another immigrant-filled boat Thursday morning off the San Diego County coast, the fifth maritime smuggling attempt foiled in the last week.

U.S. Border Patrol agents apprehended eight suspected illegal immigrants as they came ashore on Swami’s Beach in Encinitas. The seven men and one woman were aboard a small panga boat.

A total of 56 immigrants and suspected smugglers have been arrested since April 9, according to U.S. Customs and Border Protection.

– Richard Marosi reporting from San Diego

The incident began when a gunman robbed a Radio Shack in the Pacific Beach area and fled in a car with Colorado license plates, police said. A motorcycle officer began a high-speed pursuit and the gunman fired several shots out the window of his car as it sped along streets crowded with early afternoon shoppers.

The motorcycle officer fired at the gunman as the two raced across a bridge over Mission Bay, police said.

The gunman stopped at a business complex in the Midway district and ran inside, with the motorcycle officer following him on foot. The officer lost sight of the suspect, then heard a gunshot and found the man lying on his back, gun still in his hand, police said.

The dead man's name has not been released. The officer was described as a 19-year veteran of the Police Department. He was not injured. His motorcycle had been struck twice by bullets, police said.

A woman passenger in the suspect's car, Chantel Lister, 23, was arrested on robbery charges.

The case is under investigation by the department's homicide squad.

– Tony Perry in San Diego

Federal authorities intercepted another immigrant-filled boat Thursday morning off the San Diego County coast, the fifth maritime smuggling attempt foiled in the last week.

U.S. Border Patrol agents apprehended eight suspected illegal immigrants as they came ashore on Swami’s Beach in Encinitas. The seven men and one woman were aboard a small panga boat.

A total of 56 immigrants and suspected smugglers have been arrested since April 9, according to U.S. Customs and Border Protection.

– Richard Marosi reporting from San Diego

If you live in the San Diego metropolitan area, and are looking to become a Yoga instructor, the Synergy Yoga Center located in the Encinitas area offers one of the more intensive programs for teacher training. One of the top teacher training schools in San Diego, the schools focuses on Synergy Yoga. Synergy Yoga by definition is based on medical and scientific research and thus is considered a holistic system of Hatha Yoga.

When engaged in the practice of Synergy Yoga, one exercises the body. In addition by focusing on conscious mental awareness, blocked emotions and energy is released. This form of Yoga is considered a breeding ground of sorts for the mind to prepare for much higher levels of Yoga.

Once you make the decision and commitment to become a Yoga instructor you will want to insure that you have chosen a program that is right for your needs and intentions. The program at Synergy Yoga Center offers three levels of certification. The Ten-Day Intensive training is held at the Encinitas facility. In addition to learning the yoga positions, there are posture clinics, lectures on nutrition, astrology, organs, Ayurveda, emotions, and lots more. The cost for the 10-day Intensive is $2600.00. The program is held quarterly. For more information on one of the top Yoga teacher training schools in San Diego, visit the Web site or call 760-753-1828.

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The fee for the Yoga teacher training course, which consists of 322 hours of instruction, is $1800.00 per year. The duration of the program is 24 months, which include 80 hours of apprenticeship and 216 hours of classroom instruction. There is also additional instruction with a visiting senior teacher which may range anywhere from 24 to 28 hours.

During you quest to become a Yoga instructor at BKS Iyengar Yoga Center of San Diego you will study the following five areas: Asana and Pranayama, Anatomy and Physiology, Teaching Methodology, Philosophy, and Basic Therapeutics. Students will meet for 6 hours per day on Saturday and Sunday.

Students prepare to become an introductory level teacher during the 2-year duration of the program. The format for the course is divided among several areas including theory, guided practice, direct teaching, student teaching, and home assignments. For more information on the BKS Iyengar Yoga Center one of the top Yoga teacher training schools in San Diego call 619-226-2202 or visit the Web site.

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